The Carrie Bradshaw Fantasy

I’ve recently begun to binge watch, Sex, and the City. One word WOW! I’ve never wanted a man more than I’ve want Mr. BIG. Yes, I know what you’re thinking, “It’s your typical Carrie Bradshaw wannabe.” You see I’ve always been intrigued by the blogging world. Going online talking about your life now that Trump is President, and what boys are currently ruining your life.

carrie  Unlike Carrie, I don’t have the most active social, and sex life. I blame the introverted genes my dad passed down to me. The most significant problems I face are meeting deadlines for my journalism class and my insecurities that I’m sure every twenty-one-year-old my age goes through. I want to get to that part of life where I’m living in one bedroom apartment in New York, staying up until 3 am, eating Chinese food while in bed. I understand that those dreams may be miles away.

I’m first-generation Mexican American living in Southern California. My mom came to the United States when she was only sixteen, in the back of a truck. She lived in Los Angeles and was a maid to a wealthy white family. She eventually married an abusive man and ended up having my two older sisters. My dad came to Los Angeles in his twenties and left behind two sons from his first marriage. When my parents eventually met they had two kids of their own, I was one of them. I’m the youngest of six. My oldest sister is twenty years older than me. Growing up with older parents, and siblings made me feel like a grown-up myself. I’ve always remembered being emotionally invested in all problems around me, including everyone’s marriages. I was there to witness my sister’s disastrous marriage, and my brother’s high school sweetheart fairytale goes down the drain. Watching the loves tales of television and everyone’s love life, in reality, is almost humorous.

Do I believe in love? Yes. I love many things. Society has created this world where we believe that the only love we have to give is to our partner in a relationship. I’ve found love outside of this. I love being around my friends, going to school (when it’s a class after 11 am) and mostly, being alone (thanks dad). I’m not saying that fairytales don’t exist. I know it sounds crazy, but I want to go through the millions of break ups and hook ups Carrie did. Well, maybe not every single one. I want to go out more, test new things, and be open to the world that is around me.

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